…may I suggest you check out the lyrics to the song T.M.I.? They’re quite droll. A sample:
Like the woman on the sidewalk at the Veterans Day Parade
Says “I’m a pagan vegan veterinarian, can I share your shade?
These ultra-violet rays are messing up my spiritual receptors
I believe this was meant to be
Wait — can you hear it?
You’ll be a priest in the next life and porn star in the life after that
I’m a hemophiliac, I could love you if you loved my cat
I got a ’69 Volvo and a recipe for bananas hashish
I’m a real blonde
I was personal masseuse to the Bhagwan Rajneesh (well, one of them)
And I believe that people ought to follow the truth of their heart
I want to fly around the world — no, wait, I’m channeling Amelia Earhart
I wanna tie your hands behind your neck and paint your name on your chest in molasses
I wanna go to Disneyland and get our caricatures done in magic marker on our asses
Yeah…”
And I said — “Really?
I like molasses.”