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So what are they doing, right here, right now?

The early 1990s had an amazing explosion of all kinds of music. Think about it:

  • Industrial and industrial-ish dance bands such as Ministry and Nine Inch Nails at the height of their popularity
  • Hip-hop was its most varied with acts like Public Enemy mixing it up with Anthrax to Me Phi Me and PM Dawn experimenting with a mellow tripped-out sound
  • The rise of techno, which would later give birth to electronica (and c’mon, tell me that in your most drunken state, didn’t you like dancing to 2 Unlimited’s Get Ready For This?
  • Bands like Nirvana/Pearl Jam/Soundgarden/Faith No More showing us what you could do if you stopped writing metal like crap
  • Sonic Youth/Loop/Mudhoney/Dinosaur Jr. exploring the possibilities of noise
  • …and Britpop

It was a great time to be a DJ, which I was, at the engineering pub at Crazy Go Nuts University. You went to the main campus pub for pitchers of watery beer, girlypop and jock rock; you went to my pub for Crown Royal and cool music.

Britpop in the early 90s, in this humble DJ’s opinion, could be split into two major categories:

  • Shoegazer bands — with guitarists and very earnest singers who sounded and look very sad. I blame British cuisine.
  • Manchester bands, who built danceable rock on top of a patter from the drum solo in james Brown’s Funky Drummer.

The Manchester bands could further be subdivided into synthy and non-synthy, each with their holy trinity. On the non-synthy side, you had the holy trinity of the Inspiral Carpets, the Charlatans and Blur while on the synthy side, you had the Soup Dragons, EMF, …

…and Jesus Jones.

So, after this long preamble, which was meant to take you down memory lane (or history lane, if you’re on the young side), I now get to the actual main point of this entry:

What are Jesus Jones up to now?

Thanks to Jen at Circadian Shift for the link!

Recommended Listening

A taste of Jesus Jones’ big hit, Right Here, Right Now, in either Windows Media or RealOne format.

A slice of the drum solo from James Brown’s Funky Drummer. The funky drummer who came up with the riff is one Clyde Stubblefield, to whom hip-hop, funk, rock and even industrial music owe a great debt.

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The next three days

For the next three days, my evening social calendar gets nutty! For two out of the three evenings, if you’re in the area of Accordion City and feel so inclined, you can join in!

Tonight: I’m very sure Plato’s Cave never has a hot tub in it. The somewhat a-little-too-in-love-with-the-whole-new-media-thing-in-that-1996-kind-of-way Derrick de Kerckhove will be moderate a hot tub panel discussion featuring wearable computing guru Steve Mann, French cyberspace philospher Pierre Levy and virtual reality artist Maurice Benayoun. The topic: How do personal cybernetic devices change the way we interact, and our perception of reality?

The web site for the venue, the DECONISM Gallery describes the event in true MONDO 2000 style:

The personal will turn political as the three intellectuals debate the nature of virtual fiction, whilst submerged in a translucent, networked, interactive and IMMERSIVE multimedia art installation. Displaying the private DECONversation as a public event will allow for an interactive reversal between the counterpublic and the counterprivate. The reversal will come into full effect as microphones and cameras will project the communal bath by means of simulation and simulacra, in the tradition of Plato’s Caves, into another spatial reality. Professor Steve Mann’s vision that: In the coming decades we will live in an age of shared realities and new levels of cultural discourse.

Well, that’s my recommended monthly allowance of postmodernism right there!

Boris is coming down to Accordion City from Montreal for this event, and I’ll probably arrange to meet with him at the nearby L’Idiot du Village Pub at the corner of McCaul and Dundas streets before the big do. They’ll have WiFi there, so he and I will bring our laptops. Boris will be the conduit for Joi Ito, who will be attending via telepresence via Boris’ webcam. I’ll blog the event, make smart-ass remarks on the #joiito IRC channel and take pictures.

Drinking may ensue after the event.

Oh, who am I kidding. Drinking will ensue after the event.

The fun takes place at 8:00 p.m. at the DECONISM Gallery, 330 Dundas St. West, across the street from the Art Gallery of Ontario. Tickets are $10 and will be available at the door.

If you want to join us, drop me a line or call my cell: (416) WIT-N-HIP. I’m serious, that’s what my phone number spells on the keypad.

Tomorrow night: I’m making it up as I go along. A man by the name of Fuzzy Gerdes and his friend Shaun Himmerick will be in town tomorrow night for the Toronto International Improv Festival. Together, they are the long-form improv act called Bare, and I will be providing incidental accordion music for their show.

Here’s a quick description of Bare:

Bare is two men who perform with the energy and presence of a 10-person group — a group with some acrobats, a fire-eater, and a rock band in there somewhere. Their show starts with a single audience suggestion, and from that tiny seed they grow an improvisational tornado of extraordinary characters, extraordinary situations, and usually one impersonation of a live animal.

Bare will hit the stage at 8:00 p.m. on Friday at the Poor Alex Theatre, which is at 296 Brunswick Avenue. Admission is $20.

After the show, drinking will ensue.

Saturday night: Are any of you bridesmaids single? I’ll be attending my friend Derek Walker’s wedding in lovely Queenston, Ontario. I’ll be bringing the dress accordion to this one.

Drinking will most definitely ensue.

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Teething pains

The look and feel of the blog — as well as some features — are going to be erratic for the next little while. Those are the risks when one is a test pilot, but what better way to give Blogware a thorough shake-down than with a reasonably popular blog?

Some notes:

1. Yeah, I know the timestamps attached to my posts are off. Not much I can do about that. I’m not on the development team, so all I can do is go to the “Settings” page and see that I’ve already selected my time zone. I’ll file a bug report.

2. Requiring an account just so you can tag your comments with your name and URL sucks. I agree with the many people who’ve sent me email and instant messages about this one, and I’m going to fight like a pit bull for that feature.

3. Where are the accordion graphics? I just haven’t had time to make new ones that fit with the site’s cleaner look.

4. Archives. For the time being, archives that predate July 2003 can still be found in my old Blogger-based blog at http://kode-fu.com/shame/. I will be working on an open source tool to move my old Blogger entries to Blogware and make it available to anyone who wants it (that is, once it’s working and once Blogware’s out of beta). I’ll even blog the process and my design notes, seeing as I’ll probably do it in Python and not touchy-feely “let’s hear our inner voice” you-can-tell-what-I-had-for-lunch Perl.

5. Those slice-of-life stories, including the actual worst date of the Worst Date Ever series. Between the new job, wrapping up my freelance clients, housemate hunting, an upcoming wedding and so on, I’ve been trying to squeeze out enough time to finish the story. the wait will be worth it.

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All your web server statistics are belong to us

Nearly two-thirds of your base are belong to Apache

While doing some research in my capacity as Tucows’ TC/DC (Technical Community Development Coordinator, a cool mish-mash of developer relations, Open Source Nerd Wrangler and playing the part of “The Cheat” to Ross Rader’s “Strong Bad”), I hit the Netcraft site to see how the server market was divided.

The latest Netcraft Web Server Survey — the August 2003 edition, which marks the 8th anniversary of the survey — says that Apache HTTP Server has its biggest share of the market ever, with 63.98% of the nearly 43 million servers surveyed. That’s about 27.4 million servers.

(For comparison’s sake, the first Netcraft survey back in August 1995 found less than 20,000 sites. That’s three freakin’ orders of magnitude’s difference in less than a decade.)

Graph: Market Share for Top Servers Across All Domains August 1995 - August 2003, courtesy of Netcraft.

Apache is really “moving zig”!

According to Netcraft, Apache has a bigger than two-to-one lead over Microsoft’s server offerings — they have 23.75% of the servers, or 10.2 million servers. When counting Microsoft servers, Netcraft lumps all the various flavours of IIS (Internet Information Services) and PWS (Personal Web Server) together. This is a 2.2% drop in IIS’ market share that is attributed to Network Solutions’ migrating the rest of their domain parking system back to Solaris from a Windows based system hosted at Interland.

No! Over half your base are belong to Microsoft!

I mentioned this to Boss Ross (who reports to Boss’ Boss Noss):

Me: Hey, Ross. Seen the latest Netcraft survey? Apache has its biggest-ever share of the server market.

Ross: So who did Microsoft take their bigger share from?

Me: Bigger share? They lost almost a million servers from their July numbers!

Ross: Check out Scoble’s blog. He said IIS is on the upswing.

I hit the Scobleizer, and sure enough, he links to a guy quoting the Port80 survey of the top 1000 corporations’ web servers. According to that survey, IIS has the lead, with 53% of the share, easily trouncing Netscape at 18.6% and Apache at 16%.

Graph: Top 1000 Corporations' Web Server, courtesy of Port80.

“You have no chance to survive, Apache, make your time.”

So who’s right?

Probably both.

The Netcraft survey is Internet-wide, which accounts for anyone running a server, which ranges from my neighbour Hector all the way to Amazon, while the Port80 survey is restricted to Fortune 1000 companies.

In other words, if you limit your scope to the suits, all your base are belong to Microsoft. However, if you expand your scope to include the suits and everyone else, including Google, the Internet Archive, a zillion blogs, hosting services, DNS, and anything else that doesn’t wear a tie and say stuff like “That’s not on my action item list!” and “Let’s run it up the flagpole and see who salutes!”, things are quite different.

Suddenly I’m reminded of Danny O’Brien’s recent remarks:

Also the Microsoft stuff continues to have its head stuck right up the ass of corporate America. One of my big bones with MS stuff is that it always makes me feel like I’m eating out of the trash bins outside a cubicle farm. All of their software is designed to help busy executives plan their lives. Everyone I know uses it to try and write birthday cards and chat with their friends. When people use Microsoft Office they use it anywhere but in an office. Microsoft knows this – but it also knows that the money comes from their corporate clients, so there’s a limit to how much it can bend its software toward a wider customer base. Ultimately when you use MS software, you’re not the end user MS perceives at all: we’re just living off the scraps Microsoft leaves out after feeding its big customers.

Yes, Microsoft has its games division, but I get the feeling that games are for the gaps in the borth-school-work-death cycle of good little consumers.

Where’s the software that lets you create — and no, I don’t just mean slideshows covering your ass for last quarter’s losses? I don’t think it’s coming from them.

And speaking of cubicle farms, I have a TPS report to file. Later!

Recommended Reading

Ross’ take on the whole stats thing. “Personally, I’d love to see a number that quantifies, in absolute dollar amounts, the percentage of ecommerce that each platform is responsible for faciliating. Or maybe, total HTTP gets…or how about security patches per second? Segfaults per month? ”

The Adventures of Action Item. D’you think anyone in Redmond dresses up as him for Hallowe’en?

All Your Base Are Belong To Us. Oh, the memes of early 2001…

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Geek

When good programmers make bad choices for touchy-feely-smurfy reasons

Every now and again, I reserve the right to taunt a friend mercilessly. This is one of those times.

My friend Danny O’Brien was trying to decide whether to use Perl or Python for a project. He was originally leaning towards Perl; I blame the fact that he might have been living in California too long, or perhaps he’s inhaled too many fumes while changing his lovely daughter’s diapers.

He writes:

I’m utterly torn between Perl and Python. My first choice in this case would be Python, because bad Python code doesn’t seem to be quite so personal. I’ve seen people spit blood at other coder’s Perl, just because it’s not the way that they would do it. Perl demands rather more sympathy with your predecessor than does Python. With Python, it’s just more code to stare at.

This sort of statement makes me imagine Danny at an electrical engineering class: “But professor, how does Kirchoff’s Voltage Law make you feel?”

Danny’s statement seems to imply that Perl requires you to know the previous programmer’s “headspace” in order to be able to maintain his or her code. In other words, the language alone does not communicate the author’s intent without the kind of exegesis usually reserved for studies of the subtext of inside jokes that might have appeared in the Gnostic Gospels.

You wanna get all touchy-feely and sympathetic with the previous developer’s “inner child”, don’t read their code. Instead, why don’t you two curl up in front of the TV and watch Oprah, then go hop in the hot tub and kiss?!

What is this, the Matt Damon/Ben Affleck school of coding?

That said, your successor does need to actually know the language. Most of the people I can imagine maintaining this code will know Perl but not Python. Python doesn’t take that long to learn, but reading Python to take on someone else’se project just isn’t much *fun*. Sitting down to learn someone’s Perl, while tough, does teach you about the way they were thinking when they wrote the application. Python’s clarity, I think, cuts down on its expressiveness in depicting why certain decisions were made. When I had to hunker down and learn POE or Moveable Type, for instance, I came away with a very deep understanding of how it was supposed to work. It was fun, albeit time-consuming. I sometimes have problems doing the same with slabs of Python code, just because they can be very lacking in personality.

What you call personality, I call distraction. Yes, I’m probably bound to find out more about the previous coder’s approach to programming by their Perl code. I might even able to ratiocinate their astrological sign or whether they’re dominant or submissive. But damned if I can figure out what the hell they were trying to get the code to do.

Python’s clarity is what I like about it. My first Python project — an actual paying one with an actual deadline for an actual system to be used by actual users — required me to pick up where the original developer, who had to work on other parts of the system, left off. The clarity of Python actually allowed me to see his design decisions; the obscurity of Perl would’ve been a hindrance.

That said, I’m not paid to be a programmer. What is fun is a hobby can be skull-crackingly frustrating in a job with a deadline.

Even when I have plenty of time to kill (hah!), I’d rather have a language that let me concentrate on my task and less on the language’s idiosyncracies.

Danny, being the kinesthetic sort, learned his lesson by peeing on the electric fence:

Now, a couple of days into it, I’ve begun to seriously reconsider. I’m nowhere near the Mason bit of the application, and I’m getting continually bogged down in Perl style issues that really don’t have anything to do with what I’m trying to write.

To be honest, I think this is my Perl rustiness kicking in; and I think it may go away after a few more days hacking. Worse, though, is the effect of something I thought would be a real boon – CPAN. There’s a bunch of useful utilities there that I’d love to suck in and use in my program. But they all have different idioms – all of which I have to sit down and learn. Plus there’s the whole dependency issue: sooner or later I’m going to have to install all of this on the working server, and there’s a real penalty to be paid for being dependent on a lot of scattered Perl modules. Will they work? Will they still be maintained? Which of alternative implementations should I choose?

Not into the touchy-feely thing anymore, are we, John Gray?

Oh, I’m being cruel now. Group hug!

(I’m kidding, Danny.)

Luckily, he eventually made the right decision, and I’m happy to report that things are working well for him.

Otherwise, I might have to mock him even more.

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Roast beef should quit whining

In the online comic Achewood, Teodor and Ray are giving their friend Roast Beef — the unhappiest geek on earth — a Queer Eye for the Straight Guy-style makeover.

Beef isn’t very pleased with the results, as you can see. Stereotypical geek response.

Personally, I think he looks like a badass:

Photo: 'Achewood's' Roast Beef comapred with Joey deVilla.

Lookin’ good, Beef!

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Jin and Juice

Photo: Asian-American rapper Jin (from the New York Times).

Us Asian guys, we turn up where you’d least expect and always school you propah, dogg!

I’ll let this excerpt from the New York Times article tell the story:

In his lyrics Jin talks unabashedly about his Asian ethnicity, sometimes in self-defense but more often because he wants to bolster the idea of an Asian-American rapper. In last year’s battles on BET’s “106 & Park,” rival rappers most frequently hurled ethnic insults at Jin:

I’m a star

He just a rookie

Leave rap alone and keep making fortune cookies.

But Jin turned those taunts into his own disses:

You wanna say I’m Chinese

Sonny here’s a reminder

Check your Timbs

They probably say made in China

he raps, referring to Timberland shoes. And

Yeah, I’m Chinese

Now you understand it

I’m the reason that his little sister’s eyes are slanted

If you make one joke about rice or karate

N.Y.P.D. be in Chinatown searching for your body.

Yeah, boyeeeee!