Pictured above is my primary means of getting about Accordion City, the
Scorpion King. For getting to and from work as well as travel within
the core of Accordion City that doesn’t require me to carry large
parcels, a bicycle is by far the most cost- and time-efficient means of
getting around. It’s also non-polluting and a good way to burn off some
excess calories.
I suppose I could ride one of those “city bikes” or “urban hybrids”
that everyone seems to go for these days. They’re essentially
mountain-bike-ish designs tweaked for city use, and were I the sort of
person trying to shave seconds off my trips, I’d probably get one.
However, there’s a certain charm to the old 1950’s style “cruisers”
that other bikes lack, and having fenders and a chain guard allows me
to dress nicely and bike at the same time. I’m not a stickler for
authencity; I prefer cruisers with hand brakes and gears over the
no-gear versions with coaster brakes that serious cruiser aficionados
go for.
While my bike is my means of transporting myself to and from my
workplace, for some, it is their workplace. Frank Duff is one person
who works on his bike. In September 2003 — roughly around the time I
left independent contract work to accept a full-time job at Tucows —
Duff left the world of programming to become a full-time bike courier:
There are a
number of reasons why the courier life was particularly attractive to
this budding young programmer. Part of it was of course standard Office
Space fantasy. But there was more. Gibson and Stephenson had taught me
that the messenger, the mailman, was a vital romantic figure. The
soldier of the information age.
And I won’t
pretend that I was blind to the fact that, in this urban world, the
devil-may-care deliverator is something of a sex symbol.
And besides, I liked to ride. I loved it.
Duff writes about why he chose to leave the “in the mind” world of
computer programming and go into the “in the body” world of the bike
couriers.
My street musician hobby has given me insights into Accordion City and
the people on its streets that otherwise would’ve escaped my notice. Duff seems to have had the same experience as a courier:
And
couriering will teach you to know your city in ways you never imagined.
I have always loved Toronto, but if you will forgive the metaphor, I
feel that my relationship has transitioned from that of a secret
admirer to that of a lover. I can call up at will the most intimate
details of the financial core and of various tendrils extending
therefrom.
You will
develop a camaraderie with the other peoples of the street. You will
find yourself exchanging knowing nods with hot dog vendors and buskers.
Even mailmen and FedEx drivers (with whom couriers share a mutual
conviction that each’s job is superior to the other’s) become your
brothers and sisters of sorts.
He’s also discovered the power of street cred:
And yes, if you have even the slightest bit of charm, you will have plenty of opportunity to pick up hot receptionists.
Being a bike courier isn’t a job for everyone. It’s
hazardous work; there are a lot of car drivers out there who think that
bikes don’t belong on the road and many more who just have no idea how
to share the road with cyclists. It can be unpleasant biking all day
when it’s 20 degrees below freezing. It also doesn’t pay terribly well.
He says that it worked out to CAD$7.00 an hour when he started out; I
made more than that selling sno-cones in high school, and that was in
1985 dollars. This must’ve been a drastic change from the paycheque he
was collecting as a programmer.
In spite of all the drawbacks, I must credit Duff with taking a chance
and seeing if he was really doing what he wanted to do. I’ve always
said that if you’re going to spend half your waking life doing
something, it shouldn’t be something you hate or dread.
That TikTok wellness influencer is so close to getting it.
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My dad has a "City Bike". He only bikes in the suburbs and long straight roads of farmland (to get "out of town" a bit)
But his job let him trade in his unused vacation days for a bike or money, and he "was going to get a new bike anyway", or so he says...
I can't make fun of him, because I have a mountain bike in downtown Accordion City. ALL THOSE MOUNTAINS! But my excuse is that when I bought it, it was September and all the second hand bikes in my size were gone, and the cheapest new bike was a mountain bike. I am all for the cheap.
I can totally understand that Duff guy. I dropped a 20-year long carreer in computer programming to be a horseshoer.
Now, instead of spending my days in a small, climate-controlled cubicle looking at a screen, I instead travel the countryside, play with dogs, cats, goats and such and get kicked by horses (just once so far, by a 40-inch high pony).
Oh, and don't forget the exercise. It's a really really really tough job. I've been doing this for about a year and lost 20 pounds so far. :-)
-- Mauro