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“Dear U-Turn Laverne…”

“We don’t take kindly to ‘your kind’ ’round here is a stock bit of dialogue from a zillion movies set in a small town in the southern U.S., but it’s also the opener for this warning that a guy in Franklin, Tennessee (home of Veggie Tales!) hands out to those who dare to break their U-turn laws…


Click to the photo to see it on its Flickr page.

Here’s the text of the letter:

Dear U-Turn Laverne,

We don’t take kindly to “your kind” in this small town. U-turns were outlawed way bak in the horse and buggy days which obviously you are too young to remember. We were are [sic] appalled when we witnessed your u-turn almost directly in front of the old movie theatre. Let this be a friendly warning “OUTTA TOWNER” that we will kindly perform a citizen’s arrest if we cathc you even appearing to pull another stupid stunt like that. Your lic. plate has been recorded & you have been fore-warned “buster”

Signed,

Concerned citizen’s [sic] for a better-safer Franklin!!

If they’d pulled a three-point turn, I think the “Concerned citizen’s for a better-safer Franklin” would’ve simply shot them on sight. I get the feeling that they’ll be talking about this for years to come: Hey, Jed, remember that there time back in aught-seven when them outta towners pulled a u-turn? We done showed ’em!

Joey deVilla

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