Citizen’s Insertable Swiftness Manifest
Being the day before Thanksgiving, today’s a busy day at airports all across the United States. If you’re flying today, the Citizen’s Insertable Swiftness Manifest will guarantee that you’ll breeze through security*!
![](data:image/svg+xml;charset=utf-8,<svg height="812px" width="500px" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" version="1.1"/>)
* Straight into the body cavity search room, that is.
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It is, after all, Insertable.
Rarely do I laugh until I have tears in my eyes.
You forgot piñatas! The piñata made it to Canada!