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Ghetto Hikes (or: Shit Inner City Kids Say in the Woods)

Photo of a tree leaking sap, captioned "Hey! Somebody gimme some toast, this tree leakin' Smuckers out the side."

The author of the Tumblr known as Ghetto Hikes simply describes it this way:

I’m 28. I have a full-time job leading urban kids on nature hikes. I simply write down shit they say.

Some of that shit:

  • “Them sheeps is funny lookin’, homie, wearin’ a snuggie full time.”
  • “Rocks, sticks, rivers…needa come out here with my fuckin’ art supplies, paint allll this beautiful shit.”
  • “Mr. Cody, this cool, but next time I get my cousin Dwayne to deliver us Papa Johns. Dwayne turn these woods into a pizza party forest.”
  • “Jamarcus mad cuz I change his facebook to say he like men and he can’t change it cuz this forest ain’t got no wifi.”

and my personal fave:

  • “Hey, Imma leave this cologne out for the animals. Help a brother get some pussy in the matin’ seasons.”

Ghetto Hikes, yo. Check it.

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