Post found via Rick.
Click the poster to see it at full size.
On the off-chance you make first contact with space aliens, you might want to consult this poster for advice. Which includes suggestions to stand still, know some math and do whatever you can to prove that we’re an intelligent, self-aware species (or at least a close approximation thereof).
Oddly enough, there’s no advice on what to do in case the aliens are into anal probing (who knew there was a Wikipedia article on the topic?), as popularized in this legendary Kids in the Hall sketch:
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Similar to and perhaps influenced by Toronto's Ryan North and his Time Traveller's Essentials print:
http://www.topatoco.com/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=TO&Product_Code=QW-CHEATSHEET-PRINT&Category_Code=QW#pic
What if they're looking for life that could evolve into a threat (or other kind of problem), in order to eliminate it?
Sometimes you're better off playing dumb.