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The “Bike Knowledge to Beard” Ratio

bike knowledge to beard ratio

Here’s some useful information for the next time you’re at a biker bar. For the beard on the right, we’ll also accept “Jesus”, who also has no need for a bike.

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STEAK. BEER.

STEAK BEER

Click the photo to see it at full size.

I love this photo. It’s of a “beefsteak” — a kind of banquet where you get all-you-can eat slices of beef tenderloin that you eat with your hands — held by tycoon H.H. Rogers for his pal Mark Twain (Rogers and Twain are the ones standing by the windows). Note that everyone’s wearing an apron — you use them in lieu of napkins.

What would it take to organize such an event here in Accordion City? I’m certain that the ladies and gentlemen of this fair town would enjoy such an event.

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This is Why Mommy and Daddy Took Up Drinking

kid ruins tv

Using a TV as a canvas has some interesting artistic possibilities, but I’m sure that’s of no concern to this kid’s parents. I have no idea what the white goop the kid used is, but if it’s water-soluble, there’s a chance the TV could be saved.

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The Batman Greeting Card That Missed the Point

batman greeting card

While amusing, whoever made this greeting card doesn’t know why Bruce Wayne became Batman in the first place. Allow me to summarize:

Remember when we this movie came out and we thought “Wow, this is the darkest a Batman movie will ever be?”.

my_parents_are_deeaaaaaad

my parents are dead 2

Click to see at full size.

batman year 1

my parents are dead 3

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“Beer is Like Pouring Smiles on Your Brain”

beer is like pouring smiles on your brain

Photo by Danny Sullivan. Click to see the original.

Truer words were never posted on a sign outside a bar. In case you were wondering, this is Mutt Lynch’s (“Orange County’s dive bar”) in Newport Beach.

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Some Damned Fine “Archer” Cosplay

archer cosplay

Nicely done.

For reference…

lana kane

Lana Kane

sterling archer

Sterling Archer

kreiger's virtual girlfriend

Krieger’s Virtual Girlfriend

algernop krieger

Dr. Algernop Krieger

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Con[TRAP]tion Turns Ho-Hum Tunes Into Swag Tracks

contraptionJust be thankful this is an April Fool’s joke and not real: the fine folks at the electronic music/DJ school Dubspot are singing the praises of Con[TRAP]tion, a virtual studio plug-in that lets electronic musicians easily create tunes in the “trap” genre, which may quite possibly the only style of music more aggravating than dubstep.

The video above features Dubspot instructor Chris Petti walking through Contraption’s varied settings, which range from “Swag” to “Turnt Up” to “Maybach Music” (named after rapper Rick Ross’ music label) to the all-out “Damn son, where’d you get that?”. Marvel as he runs Madonna’s Into the Groove, Men Without Hats’ Safety Dance and other hits through Con[TRAP]tion, turning them into swag hits you can enjoy with your bros. I can almost smell the AXE body spray just listening to these tracks!

In case you’re not familiar with the trap genre, I’ve included the video below. It’s unsurprisingly titled Damn Son Where Did You Find This?

Found via Ray Trace.