As a YouTube watcher, you can already sense the impending FAIL, but as far as “Ali” was concerned, there were no possible bad outcomes when he placed a watermelon on a glass patio table and attempted to cleave it in twain with a scimitar:
To add insult to patio table injury, the watermelon came out of the experience intact.
Ali’s loss is minor compared to Ethan Schneider’s. He and a buddy were trying to impress friends at a party with a trick where he’d hold a kielbasa in his mouth while his buddy sliced it with a katana. You already know where this is going…
Here’s what TMZ reports about the aftermath:
4 hours of surgery and a slew of stitches later, Ethan got his sniffer back. He can smell but has no feeling … and doctors aren’t sure if it will ever come back.
That’s called a good result.
If you’re the morbidly curious type, feel free to mosey on down to TMZ’s story, where you can see the pre-surgery pictures (after clicking on a “Warning! Graphic photos!” link first). You might not want to do this if you’re eating or easily nauseated.
Back in 2013, YouTube video personality Ryan Higa tried a real-life version of Fruit Ninja, but apparently forgot that unlike the game, everything in the real world comes with mass and Newton’s Third Law built-in:
A key difference between Ryan Higa’s video and the first two in this article is that Higa shot his video properly. The others fell victim to Vertical Video Syndrome, a common problem with videos shot using phones:
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I love how dude not only uses a maxi pad instead of a bandage, but that he puts the sticky side toward the wound, instead of the absorbent side!