Month: July 2020
The supremely right-wing and autocratic (and hence, bosom buddies with Trump) president of Brazil, Jair Bolsonaro, announced that he has tested positive for the novel coronavirus.
And then, like the dick he is, he took off his mask during the announcement and said:
“Just look at my face. I’m well, fine, thank God … Thanks to all those who have been praying for me … and to those who criticise me, no problem, carry on criticising as much as you like.”
I’ve had many great first weeks on the job, but this first week on the job had a particularly unfair advantage: I was working at b5media, and the timing was such that my first week on the job was the same week the company went to the South by Southwest Interactive Festival 2008 — that’s the one where Airbnb launched and got only two bookings.
I arrived on Day 1 of the festival and was going to spend a long time in the registration line, when some friends — Min Jung Kim and Rannie Turingan — who were on the “How to Kick Ass at Your First SxSW” panel heard I’d arrived. They somehow used their panel host powers to fast-track me through registration, bring me up to their panel (which was full of big names), and then play accordion for the audience.
That’s what the photo above shows. The best part? I’m literally upstaging Tim Ferriss.
Big, grandiose, hypothetical gestures? Oh yeah.
Small, practical, proven measures? HELL NAW!
(And will someone make those “PEE PEE POO POO” caps, please?)
Update: Someone makes “PEE PEE POO POO” caps!
Yours for the not-so-low price of $32.35 at TopTenLine, an Etsy store.
With most fireworks displayed canceled due to the pandemic, there will be more than the usual number of people lighting their own fireworks. If this is your plan, this safety announcement is for you!
Hand sanitizer and fireworks don’t mix
The pandemic complicates everything, including fireworks. In this case, it’s because COVID-19 means that we’re using more hand sanitizer than ever.
Hand sanitizer is at least 60% alcohol, which catches fire rather easily. Make sure your hands are dry before lighting fireworks, sparklers, and matches or lighters.
Alcohol (as in booze, not rubbing alcohol) and fireworks also don’t mix well
Do I even have to point this out?
Follow these safety guidelines
Here are some guides on using fireworks safely:
- National Safety Council: Fireworks Safety
- ProtectAmerica: For your Fourth: Fireworks safety guide
- Popular Mechanics: How to Have Fun (and Stay Safe) During This Year’s Fireworks-Filled Fourth
- ABC News: What to know about fireworks safety ahead of the 4th of July
If you’re going to be dumb with fireworks, at least record a decent video so that I’ll have funny compilations to watch
Here are some moments showing fireworks gone wrong…