Categories
Geek

"Mystery Date" Hates Nerds!

The Mystery Date board game

I asked my sister about the sort of present I should get for her oldest son, who’s a very bright five-year-old, and she replied “board games”. I thought this was a good idea; while board games don’t have the flash of today’s videogames for kids, there’s still something about them that videogames can’t touch. They don’t need power or a TV set, they can be played just about anywhere, and they encourage social interaction the way most videogames — even the Wii, which can be a very social game console — can’t.

With my sister’s suggestion in mind, I went to the Toys ‘R’ Us closest to the office: the one at the Dufferin Mall (whose secret slogan is “You can’t call us ‘The Ghetto Mall’ anymore!”). While looking through the board games section, I found this:

Front of the box for the board game 'Mystery Date'.

It looks as though the old board game Mystery Date has undergone a facelift; I remember seeing the game in the 1970s (yes, I’m that old), back when the box looked like this:

Front of the old box for the board game 'Mystery Date'.

Here’s a description of the game, courtesy of BoardGameGeek:

A large white door located in the centre of the board has five ‘dates’ waiting inside. Depending on how the doorknob is rotated, a different guy will ‘appear’ when the door is opened.

Players try to collect a set of four cards. Each set of four cards corresponds to one of the ‘dates’ hidden behind the door (apart from the infamous ‘dud’).

Gameplay is determined by the instructions on the square a particular player lands on. Cards may be taken from the draw or discard pile, or from other players. When a player holds a correct set of four cards and lands on an ‘open door’ square the door is opened, revealing the date.

If the cards do not correspond to the date, the player’s turn ends but their set of cards are retained. If the ‘dud’ date is revealed, all cards held by the player are lost and replaced with a fresh set from the draw pile.

If the correct date appears when the door is opened the game is over and the player opening the door wins the game.

This game was first released in a white box in 1965 and had a ‘groovy’ upgrade in the early seventies with new artwork.

The Back of the Box

Curious about the game, I decided to read the back of the box to find out what it was about. Boy, was I suprised when I saw this:

Back of the box for the board game 'Mystery Date' (small version).
Who will you find when you open the mystery door? Click the picture to see it at full size.

Let’s take a closer look at the three dates. First is the “popular guy”, ready to take you on a snowboarding date…

Snowboarding Date with Steve-O McTokesalot

Picture of guy in snowboarding gear with board.

Many snowboarders do not make ideal dates. They’ll bore you to death about which resort has good runs and how skiers must die; they may not have the capacity to talk about anything else because they’ve liquefied their brains by listening to Danzig at high volumes on their iPods. Let’s not forget their weed habits, either — a lovely young lady I knew once dated a ‘boarder who smoked up so much that their nights of passion ended up being, shall we say, like spending hours trying to stuff a marshmallow into a parking meter. If you get my drift.

Prom Date with Preppy McSmug

Next on the list is smug guy in rented tux. I have always maintained that renting a tuxedo is like renting bowling shoes — except that with bowling shoes, the odds are that the previous renters didn’t throw up in them.

Picture of guy in tuxedo.

Smug Boy will probably spend more time admiring himself in the mirror than looking at his date. He’ll eventually go on to college to major in bird courses (I believe Americans call them “gut courses”), keggers and date rape.

The Nerd Date

Finally, a nice nerd boy, dressed like the guys from Weezer and sporting either a laptop or notepad. Unfortunately, he’s the “dud” date.

Picture of guy with short-sleeve checkered dress shirt, pocket protector, glasses and laptop.

Speaking as a nerd, this is an outrage!

Snowboard boy’s probable fate is talking to high school kids about the dangers of drugs as part of his community service. Tuxedo boy will likely end up clawing his way up to middle management at the #5-rated office supply company. However, Nerd boy’s future prospects are pretty bright and speaking from experience and observation, nerds make better dates simply because they’re grateful to get one.

So forget Mystery Date, people. Go buy Trivial Pursuit instead. Better yet, go out with a nerd on a Mystery Science Theater 3000 date! You won’t regret it.

Categories
Geek

Introducing the Tainted Vista Review!

The Tainted Vista Review

Over at Global Nerdy, I’ve got the first article of a new series: The Tainted Vista Review in which I make reports about my experiences using Windows Vista on the laptop sent to me by the Microsoft-Acer-Edelman troika. As I state in the article, asides from saying “Thanks for the free laptop”, I’m not beholden to them. Simply put, my opinion and the laptop are as out of their control as their PR strategy is.

This first post covers installing XNA Game Studio Express, Microsoft’s tool that’s supposed to make it easy to develop games for both Windows computers and XBox 360 consoles.

Categories
Geek It Happened to Me

Blogger Don’t Preach (I’m Keeping the Laptop)

[This has been cross-posted to my tech blog, Global Nerdy.]

Ferrarigate

Acer Ferrari 1000 laptop.

If you’ve been following the technology blogs over the holidays, you’ve probably heard about Microsoft’s latest “guerilla marketing” move to promote Windows Vista: give some bloggers a free Acer Ferrari 1000 or Acer Ferrari 5000 laptop pre-loaded with Windows Vista to try out. The bloggers were given the laptops and had the option of sending them back once they were done with their review, given them away or keeping them.

This giveaway had an unintended consequence: a ruckus on tech news sites and blogs along the lines of Microsoft is bribing bloggers! What didn’t help are cases like Brandon LeBlanc, the blogger who failed to immediately disclose that Microsoft had given him his shiny new laptop in his initial post about it. (“I had intended to explain where this laptop came from in a more in-depth post,” he later wrote, but by then, his credibility was gone.)

In response to the kerfuffle, Microsoft is asking the bloggers to whom they sent laptops to either return them or give them away once they’re done with their reviews.

To which I respond: “Sure, but did you know I like to review things for a couple of years, just to be thorough?”

Full Disclosure

Yes, I am one of those bloggers.

A Ferrari 1000 laptop arrived at the office yesterday. I picked it up and thanks to the prior obligation of the deVilla extended family Christmas party, didn’t even to unpack it until late last night. Only this morning did I get a chance to fire it up and take it for a test spin.

(For the benefit of those of you who are hardcore fact-checkers, you can go to the DHL site and enter this tracking number — 7995316991 — to verify that it did indeed arrive only yesterday.)

A Quick Overview of the Ferrari

In the age of sub-$1000 notebooks, the Ferrari 1000 is a luxury model. It boasts some pretty decent tech specs:

  • AMD Turion 64 X2 processor
  • 1GB of RAM
  • 160 GB hard drive
  • 12.1″ WXGA glossy screen
  • ATI Radeon Express 1150 graphics chipset
  • Separate DVD-RW/CD-ROM drive
  • 802.11 b/g WiFi
  • Integrated 1.3 megapixel camera
  • Bluetooth
  • Bluetooth optical mouse
  • Bluetooth VOIP handset thingy
  • A black chamois that comes in its own little black case, for keeping the laptop nice and shiny

Like Porsche Design products — non-automobile items that have been styled following the automaker’s designs that allow you to overcompensate, even if you can’t afford their cars — Acer’s Ferrari laptops have been styled after the designs of Turin’s most famous export. Its glossy carbon-fiber top looks like a Ferrari interior panelling and the bright yellow Ferrari logo smack dab in the middle says “Hey, I paid a premium for this machine”, which is probably right — at the time of this writing, it retails at Tiger Direct for US$2000.

How I Got It

The laptop was sent to me by Aaron Coldiron, a senior product manager at Microsoft and manager of the community and blogger strategy for Windows Vista. I met him back in October at an invitation-only event in Toronto where he an a couple of guys from Redmond showcased some of Vista’s features. They handed out Release Candidate 1 of Vista at the end of the presentation, and I attempted to install it on my desktop computer at the office the following day. The results weren’t so hot, and I chronicled them in the following blog entries:

You’d think I’d be the last person they’d send a laptop pre-loaded with Windows Vista, but that’s what happened. On December 13th, I got an email from Aaron offering me one. Here’s the key excerpt:

It was nice meeting you back in October at the Windows event in Toronto. I was chatting with Claire Rankine on the Microsoft team about getting some hardware out to key community members, and we wanted to include you in this. I’d love to send you a loaded Ferrari 1000 courtesy of Windows Vista and AMD. Are you interested? Hopefully you’ll have a much better experience with this pc than you did with the upgrade experience.

This would be a review machine, so I’d love to hear your opinion on the machine and OS. Full disclosure, while I hope you will blog about your experience with the pc, you don’t have to. Also, you are welcome to send the machine back to us after you are done playing with it, or you can give it away to your community, or you can keep it. My recommendation is that you give it away on your site, but it’s your call. Just let me know your opinion on Windows Vista and what you plan to do with it when the time comes.

I wrote him back, saying:

I’d like to try the Ferrari and Vista and try it under what I call “Tech Evangelist working conditions” — that is, my day-to-day routine. That involves:

  • Maintaining three blogs — the Tucows blog, Global Nerdy and The Adventures of Accordion Guy in the 21st Century
  • Helping maintain Tucows’ web sites
  • Writing technical articles and accompanying demo code, such as the “Duke of URL” (currently in PHP, but I’ll be expanding to C#)
  • Doing developer relations with Tucows’ partners and vendors
  • Doing work with TorCamp, ICT Toronto and other organizations who a promoting Toronto as a live/work/play hub for technologists

One of the first things I’d load on the machine are the Visual Studio Express kits and XNA Game Studio Express, which has really piqued my curiosity (especially the XBox 360 dev kits, as I am both a developer and an XBox 360 owner).

And in response, he wrote:

I haven’t read any reviews like what you’ve suggested so it should be fun. I’ll get this out to you next week.

And hence I got the machine.

Give It Away, Give It Away, Give It Away Now

As of Christmas eve, the mail server at work has been rejecting my email password, so I haven’t received the mail that Aaron has apparently been sending out in response to the flack about the giveaway. According to Marshall Kirkpatrick, it goes likes this:

No good deed goes unpunished, right? You may have seen that other bloggers got review machines as well. Some of that coverage was not factual. As you write your review I just wanted to emphasize that this is a review pc. I strongly recommend you disclose that we sent you this machine for review, and I hope you give your honest opinions. Just to make sure there is no misunderstanding of our intentions I’m going to ask that you either give the pc away or send it back when you no longer need it for product reviews.

I’ll email Aaron from my GMail account and see what he’s got to say. But like I said, I can review a product for a very long time.

A Dirty Little Blogger Secret

Okay, it’s not so dirty, and it’s not so secret either: one of the things that keeps me blogging are the perks. A little name recognition here, a couple of books to review there, free passes to wine-and-cheese events, pricey conferences and so on. I simply say up front that so-and-so is giving me free stuff or a free pass and to keep that in mind when reading my review or recommendation.

I’m with Hugh McLeod on this one:

Having both received and given out free stuff in the blogosphere, I’m not sure if I see what the big deal is. I certainly don’t have trouble with it ethically, as long as all parties are being upfront about it. And it seems like they are to me.

My experience with blogger product campaigns tells me that, if you’re just trying to turn bloggers into product pimps, you will fail. But if you see it as a way of starting interesting conversations with equally interesting people, your chances of succeeding are far greater.

While I’ve had Vista installed on my office PC for the past couple of months, it’s been second banana to my PowerBook. For the most part, the Vista-PC combo at work has been relegated to web browsing on another screen while I’ve been using the Mac to do all the real work.

By sending me a laptop with Vista pre-installed, Microsoft has actually managed to get me interested in Vista and giving it a thorough look-see to see if “there’s really a there there.”

So, in summary:

  • I have in my possession a Ferrari 1000 laptop that Microsoft gave me to review.
  • In the original email, I could keep the laptop, return it to Microsoft or give it to the community. It was recommended that I give it to the community.
  • I have not signed any agreements with Microsoft, legally binding or otherwise. There are no strings attached
  • I plan to blog about my experiences with both Vista and the Ferrari laptop.
  • I hear that Microsoft is asking us to now either return the machine or give it away once we’re done reviewing it.
  • I plan to review my machine for a good long time.

If Microsoft reeeeeally wants me to send the machine back, I will — if Aaron can beat me at an accordion-playing contest, Devil Went Down to Georgia style, to be judged by audience applause. I’d be cool with giving away the machine if I lost in such a competition.

Categories
Geek

What’s This All About?

'I Want to Believe' poster with UFO replaced by RSS icon.

Want to know what this image is all about? Go check Global Nerdy and find out.

Categories
Geek

Only Global Nerdy Would Run a Graphic Like This

Today on Global Nerdy:

Soap on a shower floor with the Google 'I'm Feeling Lucky' button superimposed.

C’mon, would Scoble show an image like this for the story about Google deprecating its SOAP API on his blog? Arrington? Om? My newest LinkedIn buddy, Jason Calacanis? (Okay, he might, and I think Marc Canter would too.)

But seriously, folks: for smart-headed and smart-assed tech news, Global Nerdy’s the place to go.

Categories
Geek

Over at "Global Nerdy"…

Over at my tech blog Global Nerdy, we’ve been blogging like a mofo:

Categories
Geek Toronto (a.k.a. Accordion City)

Toronto Transit Google Map

[via Torontoist] Here’s another Google Map-based web application that you might find handy if you live in Accordion City: this interactive Toronto Transit Map, shown below:

This map takes a Google Map of Toronto and overlays it with the routes for the following transit systems:

  • TTC
  • Brampton Transit
  • Go Transit
  • Mississauga Transit
  • Vaughan Transit
  • VIVA

Just enter an address or intersection as you would into a Google Map, and you’ll see the routes around it.