Jo-Anne Liburd one of the people who helped run For the Love of Breasts gala, sent me this photo, which along with The Best Accordion Picture Ever, was taken by the even’t official photographer:
The redhead in the shot is Allison, who ended up joining me onstage (after I was invited by the band), in these shots.
I now live in a Smirnoff ad. Whoo!
Sorry about the delay on that picture. I was a little busy and didn’t get around to it.
I got a few emails that seemed to imply that if the former Best Accordion Picture Ever was of a comely young lass wearing nothing but an accordion, the new Best Accordion Picture Ever should be at least MAXIM-grade “stroke material”. I’m sorry to disappoint you, but the lovely young lady in the new photo is wearing considerably more clothing than the old one.
And somehow, it’s sexier. It’s also my little contribution to the rehabilitation of the accordion’s image.
Rather than argue the merits of what’s sexy and what’s not, why don’t I just cut with the chatter and present the photo? Here it is, and if you click on it, you can get taken to a fuller-size version in the For the Love of Breasts photo album.
I have achieved my life’s goal: I now live in a beer commercial.
This is Louise. I met her at Burning Man in 1999. We got along famously, and while we were getting acquainted, she graciously posed for what used to be the Best Accordion Picture Ever:
One of the people behind last Saturday’s For the Love of Breasts gala sent me a photo that shall be the new Best Accordion Picture Ever, and I’ll post it on Monday.
Have you ever wondered how hard it is to ask “Pardon me, do you have any Grey Poupon?” from inside a limo?
(For our non-North American readers: this is a gag based on a famous series of television ads in which a distinguished man with a vague British accent in a Bentley rolls down his window and asks passers-by by if they have a particular brand of dijon mustard.)
For our pal Chetan, it’s very, very, very hard.
(Chetan’s the creator of the comic character Tic Toc Tom, a character so cool that he’s open to all sorts of interpretations by different writers and artists. Tic Toc Tom is the predecessor of Jenny Everywhere, right down to the goggles.)
Two days before my birthday party, for her friend Kerry-Ann’s birthday, Sam rented a limo into which Paul B., Paul M., Chetan, Kerry-Ann, she and I piled into for a rye-and-coke-soaked city cruise, followed by a nice steak dinner at the Keg Mansion. While driving about the city, we got the goofy (and probably alcohol-induced) idea that one of us should try the “Grey Poupon” gag. Chetan, being near the window facing the sidewalk, was assigned. The following QuickTime video clips document what happened.
It’s happened on each of my three birthday parties, and always in my kitchen: a committed, attached or unavailable-in-some-way-or-another young woman accosts me against the fridge with a passionate kiss in front of a witness.
This is the story of the last one.
Her: You handled those cops so well!
Me: It’s just negotiation, that’s all.
Her: I would’ve been screaming at them, telling them to fuck off and probably get arrested.
Me: The trick is not to do that, see?
Her: Well, you deserve a drink. Shot of Jagermeister?
Me: Please.
She pours two shots. She drinks one, and pours the other down her cleavage.
Her (stage whisper): Drink.
Me: Uh…er…well, okay.
Soon afterwards, Sam walks into the kitchen, sees what’s going on, but can’t resist watching.
Her: You’re so cute.
Me (thinking): You’re damned right.
She leans into to deliver a long lingering kiss, which includes a very sharp bite to my lower lip. She then leaves to catch up with her boyfriend.
Sam: Wow! You’re a machine, man!
Me: Ow.
My lower lip is really smarting, and I place my index finger on the sore spot. There’s a drop of blood.
Me: Ooh. Sort of like my last girlfriend. No, wait — the second last one.
Sam: That’s just freaky!
Me: Strangely enough, I’m really turned on right now.
I’ve uploaded the photos from the For the Love of Breasts gala held Saturday night. There’s no story attached just yet, but you might be able to ratiocinate it in the meantime. The story and video will appear later.
Yes, I swear the picture shown above is a candid shot.
…but let me assure you, it’s been for good reasons, and some of them are even bloggable!
Halley Suitt says that most of us bloggers are actually at home Saturday night. Not this blogger, who took his brand-new accordion out for a spin at the For the Love of Breasts gala that evening…
Have I mentioned how much I love this instrument?
Details forthcoming.