Category: Music

Categories
Music

“London Underground”

I should’ve posted this video during the recent (and blessedly short-lived) transit strike here in Accordion City, but I remembered it just now. It’s London Underground, a musical rant about Jollie Olde London’s subway system, performed by the team of Adam Kay and Suman Biswas, known as Amateur Transplants. Be advised, it’s pretty sweary:

Here are the lyrics:

Some people might like to get a train to work
Or drive in in a Beemer or a Merc,
Some guys like to travel in by bus,
But I can’t be bothered with the fuss today
I’m going to take my bike,
Coz once again the Tube’s on strike.
The greedy bastards want extra pay
for sitting on their arse all day
even though they earn 30K.
So I’m standing here in the pouring rain,
Where the fuck’s my fucking train?

London Underground
London Underground
They’re all lazy fucking useless cunts
London Underground
London Underground
They’re all greedy cunts I want to shoot them all with a rifle.

All they say is “Please mind the doors”,
and they learned that on the two day course,
This job could be done by a four year old.
They just leave us freezing in the cold.
What you smell is what you get
Burger King and piss and sweat
You roast to death in the boiling heat,
With tourists treading on your feet
and chewing gum on every seat,
so don’t tell me to “Mind the gap”
I want my fucking money back.

London Underground
London Underground
They’re all lazy fucking useless cunts
London Underground
London Underground
They’re all greedy cunts I want to shoot them all with a rifle
La la la la
La la la la

The floors are sticky and the seats are damp,
Every platform has a fucking tramp,
But the drivers get the day off when we’re all late for work again,

London Underground
London Underground
Wah-wah-wankers! They’re all wankers!
London Underground
London Underground

Take your Oyster Card, and shove it up your arsehole.

If the TTC go on strike again, I’ll write and record a Toronto version.

Here are Amateur Transplants performing London Underground live. I love how in this version they’ve replaced the line “chewing gum on every seat” with “nailbombs on every seat”:

If the Tune Sounds Familiar…

If London Underground gave you a certain feeling of musical deja vu, that’s because Adam and Suman borrowed the tune from Going Underground by legendary late-70’s/early-80’s Brit band The Jam. This tune as well as another hit by the Jam, A Town Called Malice, are part of the soundtrack of my youth.

Here’s the video for Going Underground:

Categories
funny Music

The Crowd at a Rock Show

The webcomic Subnormality has done a good job at summing up the audience at a rock show:

“Subnormality” comic: “The Crowd at a Rock Show”
Click the comic to see it at full size.

Categories
Music Toronto (a.k.a. Accordion City)

Ed Force One!

If you haven’t yet seen these photos from the Iron Maiden Land in Toronto article in BlogTO, you’re in for a treat: here are photos of Ed Force One, the custom-painted Boeing 757 that Iron Maiden are flying about in their world tour, landing here in Accordion City:

Photos of “Ed Force One”, a jet customized with Iron Maiden’s logo and mascot, “Eddie the Head”
Photos by Tom Podolec. Click the photo to see the BlogTO article.

Even more rockin’ than the jet’s design is the fact that Iron Maiden lead vocalist Bruce Dickinson is the pilot! (As is heavy metal singing and piloting weren’t enough, Bruce also has a very good slot on BBC’s 6 Music: Friday Rock Show.)

The name “Ed Force One” comes from the band’s mascot, Eddie the Head, the evil mummified creature who’s been gracing all the Iron Maiden album covers since my grade 5 days when my friend Dean Burzese and I would obsessively study them.

If you missed Iron Maiden’s concert, you can experience the next best thing by rocking out on some Maiden from my childhood — you can play Run to the Hills on Rock Band and Number of the Beast on Guitar Hero 3.

Categories
funny Music

“Archie” Comics Meet Pulp’s “Common People”

“Archie” panel with “Common People” lyrics
Image from Chris’ Invincible Super-Blog
Click the image to see it on its original page.

Back in the mid- to late nineties, one track you couldn’t avoid on alt-rock radio was Pulp’s Common People (from their excellent album, Different Class), a song that pokes fun at the genteel faux-poverty of kids from rich families at art school.

In the lyrics, the “narrator” tells the story of a rich Greek sculpture student at St. Martin’s college who wants to do a little lifestyle tourism amongst the British working class. The song is purportedly based on a real-life female acquaintance of Pulp’s lead vocalist Jarvis Cocker, who had a rich Greek female acquaintance at an art school named St. Martin’s who said that she wanted to “live like common people.” Cocker embellished the story in the chorus’ lyrics, adding “I want to sleep with common people like you.” According to Wikipedia, The BBC went so far as to try and locate the real-life rich art student who inspired the song without success.

“Archie” panel with “Common People” lyrics
Image from Chris’ Invincible Super-Blog
Click the image to see it on its original page.

There are (ahem) commonalities shared by Common People and the situation in Archie comics between rich girl Veronica Lodge and the very middle-class Archie Andrews. There are probably thousands of Archie storylines that are based on Archie not having enough money take Veronica on the type of date to which she has become accustomed. Some clever Photoshopper noticed the Common People/Archie connection, took the Common People lyrics, mashed them up with panels from Archie comics, and the result is over at Chris’ Invincible Super-Blog: Archie in…A Different Class!

“Archie” panel with “Common People” lyrics
Image from Chris’ Invincible Super-Blog
Click the image to see it on its original page.

This comic/music mashup got taken to the next level — Ontario Emperor (he’s from Ontario, California, not Ontario, Canada) points to this Michael Hanscom video that uses a montage of the remixed Archie panels with Common People as its soundtrack. It’s pretty good:

Recommended Reading

Excerpt from the 'Archie' comic 'She's Goth to Have It'.

She’s Goth to Have It: An Archie comic like no other — in this one, Betty goes goth!

Comic sample: Anarchie

Anarchie: an anarchist take on Archie.

Here’s a classic Archie cover that shows the hilarious things that happen when slang changes:

Photo: Cover of an old 'Archie' comic with an unfortunate double-entendre.

Categories
It Happened to Me Music Work

The Final Countdown, Again

Didn’t I just do this?

Once again, it’s my last day at the job, which means I’m cranking that classic of 80’s hair metal: The Final Countdown by Sweden’s gift to rock, Europe.

It’s become a bit of an end-of-job tradition for me that started back at OpenCola, the dot-com that Cory Doctorow co-founded and for which I worked for during those heady last days of The Bubble. In the summer of 2001 when all but seven people (I was one of the seven) were laid off, some wag played The Final Countdown over the office intercom system. Since then, I’ve associated it with departures from a company.

As is now the tradition on this blog, I now present a couple of versions of this song.

First, there’s the video for Europe’s studio version. (I’d post it on this page, but the copyright holders don’t allow that.)

Next, there’s the live version:


Can’t see the video? Click here.

Then, the most painful cover version of The Final Countdown, performed by Deep Sunshine:


Can’t see the video? Click here.

And finally, a Bollywood number that borrows from The Final Countdown’s opening riff. (Once again, the copyright holders won’t let me post it here, in spite of their having no compunctions about ripping off Europe.)

Categories
Music

For Sale on eBay: Pete Townshend’s Camper Van

Pete Townshend’s camper van

Someone on eBay is selling what they claim to be a VW camper van formerly owned by Pete Townshend of The Who.

Pete Townshend’s camper van

Here’s the first part of the description:

TOTALLY UNIQUE. VW CAMPER OWNED AND LOVED BY PETE TOWSHEND AND PARTNER RACHEL FULLER. PERFECT CONDITION. LESS THAN 4500 MILES. MADE IN BRAZIL IN 2005 – SAME DESIGN AND STYLE AS ORIGINAL BAY CAMPER. ALL OF THE FUN WITH NONE OF THE HEADACHE. AIR COOLED.

Pete Townshend’s camper van

Here’s more:

IT HAS A RAISING ROOF, MAINS LINE HOOK UP, COOKER, GRILL, SINK, JVC CD/RADIO PLAYER WITH 5 SPEAKERS, ROOF VENT, DVD PLAYER AND TV SCREEN. IT HAS LOWERED SUSPENSION AND A SPARE WHEEL WITH MATCHING PAINTED COVER. PERFECT TO DRIVE, THIS WILL NOT BREAK DOWN FOR ANOTHER 100,000 MILES!!(at least).

Pete Townshend’s camper van

Here’s the part of the description that made me laugh out loud:

MANY A SAUSAGE SANDWICH HAS BEEN COOKED AND EATEN BY PETE IN THIS CAMPER. WE WILL BE SAD TO SEE IT GO. IT HAS BEEN SOOOOO MUCH FUN.

I thought sausage sandwiches were more David Bowie’s thing, but hey, it’s Pete’s camper. He can do what he wants in it.

Pete Townshend’s camper van

The auction ended without the reserve price being met (starting bid was £10,000), but if you really want it, I’m sure you can contact the seller and cut a deal.

Categories
Music

Happy Birthday, Bob Marley!

The mayor proclaimed — and I imagine that he did it “Diamond Joe” Quimby-style — that today is Bob Marley Day here in Accordion City. For contributing to my music collection, my accordion repertoire, my DJ career and to some really good parties, I’d like to salute the late Robert Nesta Marley with this blog’s highest honour: a filet mignon on a flaming sword.

In his honour, and for your enjoyment, a selection of his music videos…

Stir It Up

One Love

Buffalo Soldier

I Shot the Sheriff (Live)

Get Up, Stand Up (Live)

Is This Love

No Woman No Cry (Live)