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Accordion, Instrument of the Gods It Happened to Me Music Toronto (a.k.a. Accordion City)

Peril from Beyond Space!

My friend and fellow former regular at Tequila Bookworm Scott Watkins invited me to be the opening act for the first installment of Peril from Beyond Space,

a four-part play that spoofs those old 50’s black and white sci-fi

serials. I used to occasionally provide the music for his improv shows

when he was with Theatresports and miss performing with comedians, so I

accepted his invitation.


My musical/stand-up act is simply a more staged version of my street

musician schtick. The story behind the accordion and the busking act is

here; as for the stand-up, I got into it on a whim while living in San

Francisco. At the time, I was working as OpenCola’s developer

releations guy and shared a small but incredibly cool office with Cory

Doctorow. You could’ve counted the people I knew in town on both hands,

so when I saw a poster for an open mic comedy night at Brain Wash,

the cafe/laundromat across the street from the office, I saw an

opportunity to both meet new people and try something new. My act went

over quite well, and the event’s host, Tony Sparks

(a wonderful guy who gives the best introductions for the newbies),

invited me to do some other gigs at comedy clubs in the city.

I’ve done a little local stand-up — by accident. While hanging out at the bar at the Bovine Sex Club

with the accordion strapped to my back, a guy by the name of Bert

approached me and said “I figure that anyone who carries an accordion

at the Bovine has got

to be funny. Do you do stand-up? Would you like to?” Bert turned out to

be part of a sketch comedy troupe called Slap and Tickle, and I did a handful of shows with them, even getting incorporated into one of their skits. I believe my last gig with them was sometime in 2003.


The Bad Dog Theatre is small theatre near Broadview and Danforth — the western edge of Accordion City’s Greektown — with a main stage that seats sixty or so people. I arrived and met the cast,

all of whom showered me with “thanks for coming” and “hey, I love your

blog”. Then, we started discussing the schedule for the evening’s show.

“The show’s about forty minutes, and we need to fill an hour, so if you could do twenty, we’ll be fine,” said Cary.

Uh-oh.

“My act is seven minutes, eight if I do it like David Carradine,” I

said. “I was under the impression you wanted just the music and a

little banter.”

“Hmm…can you, uh, stretch it to twenty?”

Nearly three times as long?

“If we need to fill more time, I can do my ‘Beat Poetry of Ricardo Montalban’,” offered Scott.

“Crap,” I said, thinking about it. “Oh, what the hell. I accept your challenge!”

I mornally don’t get stage fright — a very embarassing gig in high

school, complete with TV cameras, cured me of that — but this time, I

was a little worried.

After a brief introduction, I walked on stage with the accordion and

did my bit, fattened up with a couple of stories from the old stand-up

routine. It went pretty smoothly. I got laughs for most of my gags and

I avoided the nightmare in which everyone goes silent and the comic

says “Ooh…tough

room.”

After thanking the audience, I went offstage, where the cast said they

liked it. Cary looked at his watch and said “Thirteen, maybe fourteen

minutes. I think we can work with that. Thanks!”

My thanks to the cast and crew of Peril from Beyond Space for inviting

me to open for their opening show, and also to the audience members who

came up to me after the show and said they loved the act and will never

look at the accordion in the same way again. Your taste is impeccable!


Photo: Onstage cast of 'Peril from Beyond Space' -- (l-r) Cary West, Nike Abbott, Paul Koster, Scott Watkins, Sam Agro, and Tracy Shea-Porter.

Theatre keeps them off the streets: from left to right

— Cary West, Nike Abbott, Paul Koster, Scott Watkins, Sam Agro, and

Tracy Shea-Porter.

Here’s the description of Peril from Beyond Space:

The year is 1947. The forces of democracy have triumphed. Millions of

Americans are raising families, buying refrigerators, and wearing

nearly identical suits. Now that fascism has been eradicated, Mr. and

Mrs. Average Homeowner can look forward to a bright new era of peace

and prosperity. Or can they? Little do they realize that a malevolent

alien race has targeted the planet earth – a race of demon monsters

that threatens every single person in the entire world…a Peril – from

Beyond Space!

Peril from Beyond Space

shamelessly savages those old Republic and RKO Pictures “science

fiction” serials, which were often just gangster movies with a

poorly-applied gloss of atomic age/space age paint. There’s plenty of

Buck Rogers pseudoscience hokum, what with the aliens’ anti-gravity

ray, the dashing scientist hero’s energy-damping null ray and

cheese-tastic props. They also poke fun at the old movie conventions

with Dave Till’s stentorian narration (complete with breaks for ads,

such as the coffee featuring “the ingredient that won the war”), the

beautiful fiancee who actually knows more than her scientist betrothed

or his dad even though “science is men’s work” and the best

father-to-son advice ever: “Good grooming equals good science!” My

favourite bit has to be the chase scene; somehow, with only four chairs

and solid thespianism, they pulled off the best one I’ve ever seen in a

stage play, complete with stunt jump!

Photo: Dave Till.

Dave Till is the announcer.

The well-done show ended with a doubly-literal cliffhanger (the

heroes’

car went off a cliff, and the dashing scientist’s name is Cliff), as

will episodes 2 and 3 of this four episode series. I had a ball

watching this show, and were it not for the fact that I have to pick up

Wendy from the airport this Friday, I’d catch it.

Peril from Beyond Space will play at the Bad Dog Theatre (138 Danforth,

at Broadview) this Friday, March 18th, as well as the subsequent two

Fridays (March 25th and April 1st). Tickets are a mere eight bucks

(five for students). Go support some live theatre and be entertained by

some really funny people too!

Categories
It Happened to Me Music

Drivin’ Music

In January 1992, my friend Henry and I decided that we’d do something different for our drive back to Crazy Go Nuts University. We would listen to only one song: Ministry’s then-new single, Jesus Built My Hotrod [Windows media sample / RealPlayer sample].

If you’re not familiar with the number, it’s a giant thrash-rock

wall-of-guitar noisefest fronted by the distorted vocals of guest

singer Gibby Haynes of the Butthole Surfers. I think we managed to

listen to it for about an hour (or 10 plays) before we decided “okay,

enough”.

Here’s a man who took on an even bigger challenge: he managed to drive from Iowa City to Chicago to visit his girlfriend, and he chose to listen to only one song — ABBA’s Dancing Queen. Eeee-yow.

Categories
Music

You’ve Got to Watch "Scent of a Robot"

Check out this excellent video for an excellent hip-hop number: Pete Miser’s Scent of a Robot,

in which the narrator acciedentally discovers that he’s not human, but

a prototype robot soon to be mass-produced. I love it when hip-hop and

science fiction collide; one gets tired of “ghetto this”, “drive-by

that” and “bling bling”.

The rap is clever and expertly delivered by Pete, who navigates the territory that lies between Del tha Funkee Homosapien and MC Paul Barman.

I’ve got to give mad props to whoever did the backing track for tossing

in a nice synth-accordion descending line; I’d call it the best

one-chord jam since Beck’s Loser. The video itself is a nice gene-splice of computer animation and live-action video.

When I first stumbled across the video, I watched it about half a dozen times. I’m hooked! Check the video to find out why.

Categories
It Happened to Me Music

Nine Inch Nails: The Hand That Feeds

Graphic: Nine Inch Nails 'NIN' logo.

I discovered one of my great guilty musical pleasures — Nine Inch

Nails — in early 1990, when that first album, Pretty Hate Machine was

a few months old. It’s one of a handful of albums around that time that

made me go “Who is this? I must have this!” after hearing only a few

songs (Smashing Pumpkins’ Gish and Nirvana’s Nevermind and Ween’s Pure Guava come to mind).

Trent Reznor is one of my musical heroes, as he proved that you could

play synth and still not sound wuss-a-riffic (before I was the Accordion Guy, I was a synth guy). Prior to Trent, most

people’s image of synth players weren’t terribly positive (Paul

Schaffer, you hurt a lot of keyboard players everywhere), and that went

double in the proto-emo-rock scene of 1992 Kingston, Ontario, where my

buddies Karl Mohr, “Craigertronic” and I were the three synth guys in

the small town of a thousand guitars. He made it cool to smash a

keyboard onstange, something I managed to do only once (after my wonky

Yamaha finally died during a gig).

Trent made my DJ career (1989-1994) at Crazy Go Nuts University stand out. While

the other campus pubs were cranking out the pap of the day — Marky

Mark’s Good Vibrations and Bryan Adams’ Everything I Do (I Do It For

You) and more Color Me Badd than you can shake a  stick at — you

came to Clark Hall Pub to hear Nine Inch Nails, along with Ministry,

Public Enemy, Sonic Youth and Jane’s Addiction.

I was the drunk guy dancing right by that stage when Nine Inch Nails

played Lollapalooza ’91 here in Accordion City. Maybe not the only drunk guy, but I

was there. And drunk.

Trent also played in indirect part in my accordion career. The first

number I played on accordion in front of a large crowd was Head Like a

Hole, which I did with Karl Mohr in front of the stunned goth masses at

the now-defunct Sanctuary Vampire Sex Bar (the story appears here).


Nine Inch Nails’ upcoming album, With Teeth, is due to be released on

May 3rd. It’s expected to be a more song-oriented album; Der Trentster

said in a recent Rolling Stone interview that “It’s going to be twelve

good punches in the face – no

fillers, no instrumentals, just straight to the point.” My face awaits!

As a fan, I present to you something I stumbled across — a crappy MP3 recording of the first single off the album, The Had That Feeds

[3.9 MB MP3, enclosure]. It’s a catchy basic little rocker whose really

fat bassline should sound good in the full-fidelity version. Enjoy!

Categories
In the News It Happened to Me Music

RIP Jimmy Smith: 1926 – 2005

Photo: Jimmy Smith at the Hammond B-3.

Jimmy Smith, master of the “Full Eights” sound on the mighty Hammond B-3!

Around 1985, the Yamaha Organ School was doing its damndest to expunge

my love for music and my sense of rhythm. While Yamaha’s musical

instrument division were practically redefining instruments — consider

the Yamaha grand piano’s bright sound, favoured by Glenn Gould and many

rock pianists, as well as the DX-7 synthesizer and the WX-7, which let

sax and clarinet players play synth — the ghouls behind the home organ

division crafted a course bereft of soul and full of schmaltz. I had a

teacher who had a bit of a legato fetish; she was an advocate of a

playing style in which the notes blurred together into a bland aural

mush. To make matters worse, I was only two out of fourteen songs

through the required Barry Manilow songbook.

After making sure that I got kicked out of organ school at the annual

recital (long story, which I’ll recount later), I became a synth player

full-time. I even went to far as to erase any of the organ sounds from

my Akai AX-60 synth. I’d had enough of that infernal instrument.

What changed my mind was a music course I took at Crazy Go Nuts

University: “Science and Technology for Musicians”. It qualified as an

“arts” course for engineering students and as a “science” course for

the music students. I often gave them a hand with the science parts

(“Uh, Joey, how do I draw a graph of a 5Hz sine wave with an amplitude

of 2?”) and they gave me a hand with non-keyboard instruments (“Uh,

Dave, how do I play a scale on a clarinet?”).

During the course, I wound up writing a paper on the Hammond B-3 organ.

This instrument was clearly the invention of a former watchmaker: a

classic Hammond is essentially a big electric motor driving a gear

system which in turn drives a series of wheels that made sound. While

writing the paper, I decided to hit the music library and listen to

artists who were considered B-3 virtuosos; that’s when I discovered

Jimmy Smith.

My bad experiences at the Yamaha Organ School, coupled with a teacher

who was more devoid of funk than the entire Michigan Militia, led me to

forget that one could play the organ with rhythm and even staccato

attacks. On the organ, Jimmy Smith’s hands and feet could be weapons;

his playing style defined what we now considered to be the de facto

organ soloing and pedalling style.

Musicians who redefine the way their

instrument is played tend to draw inspiration from other instruments. For example, Carlos Santana says that in order to perfect his signature guitar playing style, he played Dionne Warwick albums over and over and listened to her voice.

In Smith’s case, he drew inspiration from trumpet players, mimicking

their lines. He even emulated their sound in solos by killing the Leslie

(an organ spaker mounted on a rotating stand that gives organs their

“whirling” sound) and slamming every drawbar save the lowest and

highest to the “zero” setting.

After buying Jimmy’s live album, Root Down (whose name you should recognize — the Beastie Boys covered the title track on Ill Communication),

I reprogrammed the organ sounds back into my synth, and made sure than

any subsequent synth I bought could do a decent B-3 impression. Later,

when the organ made its comeback in rock in the early 1990’s (thanks

largely to the “Madchester” sound of bands like the Charlatans,

Inspiral Carpets, Milltown Brothers, et. al.), I copped more than my

fair share of Jimmy Smith licks at gigs. In 1994, I got to completely “Smith

out” when the band we opened for let me use their B-3 and Leslie. It

was heaven.

My last

synth — a Korg WaveStation A/D,

which I still have — has a patch I programmed: a monster B-3 sound

with a touch of distortion and a decent Leslie effect paired with

spring reverb. When you dial it up, its name appears in capital letters

on the display: JIMMY SMITH.


Jimmy Smith died on Tuesday at the age of 79. He’d been playing the organ for 50 years and would’ve embarked on a tour with Joey “The other keyboardist named Joey” deFrancesco next month.

Thanks, Jimmy, for all the music, and for helping me fall in love with the organ again.

Categories
Music

Rejected Wedding Theme #2

Graphic: 'Muy Muy Rapido Tuesday' icon.

Nina Hagen’s cover of My Way. [5.1 MB MP3 file, enclosure].

Categories
Music

One Last Video of Crispin Hellion Glover

What sort of nut-job gives their kid the middle name “Hellion” (meaning

“troublemaker”)? Bruce Glover, that’s who. Bruce Glover played one of

the two creepiest guys who tried to kill James Bond: Mr. Wint, of Mr.

Wint and Mr. Kidd, the creepy-geek assassins from Diamonds are Forever:

Photo: Mr. Wint from 'Diamonds are Forever.'   Photo: Mr. Kidd from 'Diamonds are Forever'. 

Mr. Wint and Mr. Kidd. Mr. Kidd is holding the “bombe surprise” from the end of the movie.

Here’s the final video treat starring Crispin Glover: a video of the song Ben from the remake of the movie Willard [PG-13:

no nudity, Disney-fied creepy, cleavage and rats, rats, rats!]. The

video gets bonus marks from me for all-out surrealism, the lingerie

girls and…yes…accordion!

In the original movie, the track was performed by Michael Jackson, so

in the end, it’s full creepy-freak celebrity-on-creepy-freak celebrity

action!

 (I would so love to see Messrs. Jackson and Glover perform Ebony and Ivory. Wouldn’t you?)

Click on the image below to go to the site with the videos,

which are available in many sizes and in both QuickTime and Windows

Media.

Photo: Still from Crispin Glover's video for 'Ben'.

“It’s okay, dude. ‘Hanging a rat’ is a figure of speech.”