The Adventures of Accordion Guy in the 21st Century

Click the photo to see it at full size.

This was in our mailbox when The Missus (I can really call her that now!) and I got home the day after our wedding: an envelope with a White House return address. I’m so pleased that my close personal friends Barack and Michelle, while they couldn’t make the ceremony, took the time out to send me a lovely card, complete with a coupon entitling me to a free drone strike to be unleashed on the person or location of my choosing.

But seriously: if you’re looking for an interesting goodie to add to your wedding scrapbook, send a wedding invitation to this White House address…

The President and First Lady
The White House
Greetings Office Rm. 39
1600 Pennsylvania Ave.
Washington, DC 20500

…you too can get this official response, as well as an addendum to your record in the NSA database. All this for the price of a stamp!

I still have a couple of invitations left, so I’m going to try these addresses:

Mickey and Minnie Mouse
The Walt Disney Company
500 South Buena Vista Street
Burbank, California 91521

Pope Francis
Prefettura della Casa Pontifica
00210 Citta del Vaticano, Italia

I’ll let you know what I get back.

The barbecue was nice, the company of best man Eldon was good, but I’m ready to get married now, thank you very much.

And by “bleaching clamshells,” I’m not speaking euphemistically (a la this not-safe-for-work scene from Bridesmaids) this, but literally. They’re table decorations, and a few of them were looking a bit grungy.

Well, the wedding is this Saturday.

The big stuff’s been dealt with: the venue was secured months ago, and we’ve had all the relevant conversations with major service providers: the catering people, the hotel’s event planner, the videographer, the photographer, the DJ, and the rabbi.

Yes, neither of us is Jewish, and yes, a rabbi is officiating. I have an explanation, but I’ll save that for an entry I’ll post sometime after the wedding.

Weather these days is a little harder to predict, and even more so here in Accordion Bay, where the Gulf winds can make the sky change in very short order. After a cool spell, things are warming up here and the days are already beginning to follow their summer pattern: sunny in the morning, clouding over in the late afternoon with maybe a little waterworks, and then clearing up at night. Ours is a brunch wedding, with the really formal stuff done by noon, the reception done by four, and the rest of the afternoon and early evening dedicated Jimmy Buffett-ing it up at the beachside bar as we toast the sunset.

Click the photo to watch the episode (while it lasts on YouTube).

While getting the last of the things to bring to the wedding packed into boxes, I’ve had that classic Star Trek episode, Amok Time, playing on one of my screens. That’s the one where we learn that Vulcans mate once every seven years (not unlike a few fans of the show), where Spock’s wedding is undone by his bride, who’d much rather be with some other guy, and where he nearly kills his friend Captain Kirk in a fit of hormonal rage (and hey, we’ve all been there before, am I right, guys?). It’s in tribute to the upcoming wedding, the passing of Leonard Nimoy, and the fact that I’ve had conversations in which Theodore Sturgeon, who wrote the episode, come up no less than four times.

I hope that your present situation is better than this cat’s.

All memes and no life makes Jack a twisted boy.

Found via Trish Thornton.